Sarah and Jake: The Identical Fraternal Twins
by MissAlyson
Summary: Jake and Sarah are the closest in the Baker family. This is their story about events in their life. Yeah, bad summary, but R&R!
1. Birthday Traditions

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters from Cheaper by the Dozen

A/N: This story is mostly out of Jake's POV because I find it easy to see things his way. Sarah and Jake are twins. They just seem like that, and I think the characters are better that way. And Jake is the older twin. So here are the ages:

Nora: 23

Charlie: 18

Lorraine: 16

Henry: 14

Jake and Sarah: 12

Mark: 10

Jessica and Kim: 9

Mike: 7

Nigel and Kyle: 5

It's story time!

**Jake: **

"Get ready to blow out the candles you two!" our dad was in our faces with the video camera, while mom was right next to him with the digital one. Our parents find it fun to have us blow out the candles on our birthday cakes on the exact minute that we were born. Sarah and I were just two out of the six, so I guess one-third of the lucky ones born in the afternoon. We were sitting at the head of the dining room table with a huge cake in front of us. The whole cake had 24 candles on it so that there would be 12 candles for me to blow out, and 12 for Sarah. Ever since Lorraine's birthday, our parents also make big deals out of our 12th birthdays because it is how many kids we have in our house. It used to be the 10th birthday until Nigel and Kyle.

"Okay Jake, you first," I was born 2 minutes before Sarah, so I went first. It would have been an easy job if the flash from the camera wasn't blinding me. It was the exact minute for Sarah by the time I was done, so she went after me. Then the two blinding lights from both cameras came at us again. After eating and all of that, we were free to go.

We decided to skateboard up and down the walkway, but then got stopped by Jessica and Kim. "Hi!" they said, jumping and smiling.

"Uh, hi...what do you want?" Sarah said sweetly.

"Well...I was reading this book about twins, and it said that once you reach the age of 12, the two begin to go into different path. The older one tends to boss the other around," Jessica was still smiling, was this funny to her? I mean, if it _is_ true, then the same thing will happen to the two of them in 3 years. Who's the smart one now?

So I rolled my eyes, "Jessica, I hate to tell ya this, but you're not the person on TV who tells everyone's future." Sarah and I never really think about those two minutes. Until we turned 10, we thought we were born at the same time, and it was dumb to make a big deal out of it.

"Well, I was trying to help! I could be a psychic if I wanted to!" Jessica yelled as she stomped off. The only good part about our birthday is that it is a day where we can do whatever we want and can't get in trouble.

After four hours of staying outside and swimming in our new swimming pool, (it was for everyone, not for us, it is only a few months old. So it's not like its a present) Dad called out for everyone to come in and change for dinner.

Sarah and I ran up to our room. It was blue inside (benefit of having a tomboy twin) with all this sports stuff around the walls and on the floor. We had glow in the dark stars on the ceiling. Our room is the only room shared by a boy and a girl, because Dad said that twins share, so it didn't really bother us because in our old house, we shared a room in Midland too.

We are called the Identical Fraternal Twins. The name was given to us by Charlie, because he said if Sarah was a boy, or if I was girl, then we'd be identical in both personalities and looks. We technically look the same (except for the gender part) but Sarah's face has a small touch of a girlish look to it. We have gotten identical injuries, scars, bruises, and punishments, and we pretty much finish everything at the same time, so as you see, the joint nickname fits.

I ran down the stairs with Sarah one step behind, we would have been on the same stair, but I was closer to the door. We sat in the dining room again at new chairs. Every kid has a chair that they only sit in at birthday dinners that have yearly pictures on it. Mostly, our chairs have professional pictures of us together, but there are our school pictures which are separate. Either way, if you put all of the pictures together (and ignored the dresses that Sarah was forced into when she was little, it stopped when we turned 10, then you get to pick out your own clothes) it looks like the same person, rather than twins. Oh yeah, you also have to ignore Sarah's long hair.

Birthday dinners were special. The twins, or single person's favorite foods were made, even if the others didn't like them. Too bad the foods had to be homemade, otherwise we just should've gone to McDonalds. Dinner passed by slowly, because Dad just _had _to tell the 6 kids that were younger than us and to remind us and the older ones, about all the cute and embarrassing things we've done in our adorable 12 years.

The rest of the night went by with Dad, Henry, Charlie, Sarah, Mike, and me playing 3 on 3 touch football. The others just watched. Lucky for us, this was not a tradition or we'd have to sit through going to the Nail Salon with Lorraine every year. Games stopped at 10:00 pm when Nigel, Kyle, and Mike went to bed. Everyone else had an hour (yeah, even Lorraine) to do anything else. Even when it's your birthday, and it's summer, you still have a bedtime.

Sarah and I were lying in my bed at 11:30, staring at the glowing ceiling. Don't get any ideas; we have been sleeping in the same bed since we came home from the hospital. Mom said we cried if we were separated, even if separated meant that our cribs had a wall in between us but was still locked together. When we got older and got beds, they gave up because there was no possible way they could get us to stay in our own beds. If they stayed up until we went to bed, then we would sit up in our beds and stare back. So we still have two beds, and we need both in case we get tired of one of them. It also means one less part of our room to clean.

"Night Jake..." Sarah yawned and turned her back to me.

"Night Sarah..." I stayed were I was. Even though this birthday had the same routine, there was something special about it. Every birthday has something different about it...oh well, I'm tired...I figure it out later...

A/N: Hope everyone liked it! R&R! When I get a certain number of reviews, I'll post chapter 2.


	2. Welcome Back, Sarah and Jake

**A/N: Yes!! I'm over being sick, our COOP exams are over, and I finished this 2 month project. Now I am able to have more free time for updating my stories!! Oh yeah, I'm pretty sure that 90 will be a Jake POV...I find it more fun to see the things through Jake's eyes.**

**taynzpink: I will keep updating. This is probably my favorite story to write because I have always wanted a twin...**

**want2stayakid: Thanks so much! It takes me days to figure out a plot for each chapter, so I'm glad my hard work paid off!**

**You know the ages, you know the kids, so let's get to the story, shall we?**

**Jake:**

Our birthday was last week, and our family still has a huge chunk of summer vacation left. It started raining two days after our birthday and it finally stopped yesterday!! So everyone chose to go outside and find something to do. Except for Sarah and me, that is. We spend enough time playing sports outdoors in the school year. Summer is our indoor time.

We do just about anything that anyone can think of. With no supervision at all, there are countless ideas that run through your head. But only one really popped out at us: rollerblading down the stairs.

This was something we started doing the day we moved here. We have only made to the first landing. But today, we will make it all the way down.

So here we are. A set of twins looking down at over 30 stairs. After about ten minutes of staring, we decided that it was about time that we were brave and went for the first jump.

This is great! I have never felt so excited...27 more stairs! I have never been so happy, so free, so--

Yeah. My thoughts stopped after Sarah and I tripped and fell those last 20 stairs. All I remember was us screaming our heads off, then everything went dark.

We woke up on the couch with 12 faces staring.

"Everything hurts..." we both murmured.

Our mom nodded. "Well I guess you took a pretty big fall, how many stairs did you trip over?"

"Umm, I lost count after fifteen," I said after thinking long and hard about my answer.

"Something is bound to be broken. How could you have not worn any protective gear?!" this is actually one of Mom's calm moments if you can believe it.

We started to open our mouths when Dad cut us off, "You know what? I don't think they need to say anything. To the emergency room! Charlie, could you grab them?" So Charlie swung one of us over each shoulder and then he put our seatbelts on for us. Out of all the Bakers that our older than us, he has always been our favorite. "Does anything hurt the most?" Dad asked us in the parking lot.

"We haven't really checked," Sarah answered for the both of us.

"Well, good. Let's make this a surprise this time." Dad always tries to make jokes when one of us gets hurt. After all the times we've been here, you'd think that he'd run out of jokes to tell.

So everyone walked in and sat down while we went up to the receptionist's desk with Dad.

"Nice to see you two again. What happened this time?" The receptionist's name is Mariah. She is very nice and understanding about our numerous accidents.

"They fell down the stairs while trying to skate down them," our dad said seriously. That would have been convincing except he was smiling.

"Well, that sounds painful. Do you have any requests?"

We nodded. "We would like our usual room and nurse," I grinned. Yeah, thats how many times we've been here. We can order.

"Great. That room is open and your nurse is always on duty there. You can go back there with your family right now if you'd like." She handed us our files. These were always out of the filing system because every time they put them back in, we're back a few days later, so they gave up. This ER is more of on ER and Out Patient, so we're always here unless we need surgery, which hasn't happened yet. Dad led everyone to our room and Sarah and I sat on the chairs meant for the patients.

"Welcome back Sarah and Jacob." Our nurse is Diane. She is 22 and has short blonde hair. The only problem is that she refuses to call me Jake. "Why are you in here today?" So Dad explained everything once again. Diane laughed and took us to get our hospital bracelets and get some tests done.

Testing took about an hour and then we were led back to our room and were told to sit down until the results came back. So our doctor (he has some foreign name you can't pronounce, but he's nice) came in and talked to us.

"Just as we thought, you two have identical injuries." We all laughed. They should take one of us in for testing instead of both, "You both have minor concussions and your broke your left wrists. You will gets casts for your wrists and those will we worn for two weeks, " there goes the rest of the summer and part of school, "the concussion means you can't sleep tonight just in case, but other than that, you'll be fine."

Sarah and I groaned but willingly went with him. He took us to a different room for casting (we both picked light blue) and then we had to wait until we were both done.

"They can go home. Remember, no resting until 3 in the afternoon tomorrow. You need to stay up for a day." Even worse, I'm tired! We were rolled out in wheelchairs as we waved to almost the whole hospital staff. They all knew us somehow. We even have our own wall in the office of pictures of us because they see us so often.

"Well, you two don't need punishment. No sleeping and 6 weeks of no fun is bad enough.." Mom sighed.

"Wait. This isn't bad, right? I mean, we still get people to help us, right?" Sarah and I said frantically.

"Yeah, but you guys can't play sports or swim," Charlie said.

"We can swim. The casts are waterproof, " I smiled.

"Fine, but no diving board. Sports and any other activities that require running are out of the question. Maybe you could try a new hobby!" Dad called out to us from the front seat.

New hobby? No sports? Why couldn't we have gone outside today?...

**A/N: You know the deal! R&R!**


	3. Fun With the Digital Camera

**A/N: Sorry about the shortness, I guess I have some writers block or something. But R&R!!**

**Disclaimer: Yeah, I still don't own anyone. And that website is not real!**

**A/N: Last week we had really lazy days at school, but I got really busy (we had 2 million tests to study for, at least it felt like it) so I had no time. But with this 4-day weekend, I was very determined and updated my other fan fic and now I'll update this one.**

**taynzpink: I will! I could promise chapter 4 to come up sometime next week or a little later (my school loves to change schedules)**

**Insane and Logical: Thanks! I love writing! And with all of the encouragement from my friends and the reviews, I've actually been able to keep going and not stop**

**Time for Chapter 3: Fun with the Digital Camera**

Jake:

Four weeks have passed. Sarah and I _did _fall asleep that day we got back from the hospital. Mom freaked out because it took her fifteen minutes to wake us up (which is normal, I'm surprised that she for got that we could sleep if a blow horn went off in the house). Apparently, people with concussions could go into comas if they fell asleep the first day. So we had a million glasses of soda (she actually FORCED us) and we stayed up all night until Mom said that it was alright to go to sleep. Sarah and I fell asleep on the couch where we stayed all day and night. There was nowhere for anyone to sit because we took up the whole couch. It was pretty hilarious to wake up to everyone sitting on the floor because Dad refused to disturb us.

When Mom wrote her book, they made a site where she could write blogs and recipes and all that mom junk. So, besides that, her publicist asked all of us (except for Kyle and Nigel, Nora promised to help them) to make a website. The next day, there were 9 sites up (twins share). We have to blog and put up videos and everything else so everyone can see and learn about us.

Our site is (creative, right? We didn't make that though). We're really good about updating, so Sarah and I update it at least once a week. But since our accident, we haven't really gotten around to it. So it was pretty much the first thing we heard this morning.

"Sarah and Jake! I need you to update your site, and that goes for everyone else too!" Mom said at breakfast.

"Mom! Why do we need those?! They are so dorky and out of style!" Lorraine updated less than Nigel and Kyle did.

"Because! People want to see the famous Baker kids and what you're really like," she gave us one of those smiles. That smile pretty much said 'it's cute and you have to no matter what'.

Lorraine left everyone alone and we were sent upstairs to work on the websites.

Every bedroom has a computer. Sarah and I don't mind sharing. But Lorraine shares a bedroom with Nora because she just moved back in after leaving Hank. Lor gets really mad if Nora is on the computer for a few minutes; Mom told her if she kept hogging the computer, there would be no computer at all.

Our favorite thing to update is our video blog. We use our digital camera because it records videos and talk endlessly (our last video was 30 minutes long) about what pops into our heads. Our site is the most visited out of all the Baker kids' sites.

Sarah grabbed the camera and I set it to video. With only one free hand each, we pretty much had to do everything together. She held it out and I pressed 'Record'.

"Hi!" we greeted the camera.

"I'm Sarah"

"And I'm Jake." Intros are really boring. "And if you mix us up, well, that's really odd."

"We haven't updated in a while because we got into another accident," Sarah went into deep details about or wonderful skating adventure. "Only using one hand is really hard. But it's great to be a twin." Great, now we sound like one of those cheesy movies about love and all that.

"Now many of you are wondering: 'What will we do today?' Well, we can't do much since of the casts," I grinned, "But we decided to..."

"...bother Lorraine!" We squealed and laughed.

"Here's the thing. Lor has been getting yelled at for being on the computer way too much. She refuses to let Nora on," Sarah said seriously.

"Yeah. If we catch her RIGHT NOW, she's going to be in so much trouble. She's not supposed to be on right now," I was still grinning. We tiptoed into Lor and Nora's room, with no Nora in there. But there was a certain Lorraine in here...and on the computer!

"Heeyyyy Lorraine.." we greeted her.

"Hi! What's with the camera?" Lor was being really weird.

"Video blog. We wanted to film you, since you're _always _ready to film," Sarah's lying skills are so good!

"Oh, film away then," Lorraine went back to the screen and paid no attention to us. But now, we got our film and then ran out of her room.

"So much for bothering her..." I really do look forward to making her mad, but I guess this is good too.

We uploaded the footage to the computer, then to our site. Then it was time to email Mom. She is always on her computer, so we knew it was okay.

_Mom, _

_Look out our new video blog:)_

_Sarah and Jake. :) :) :)_

The email was sent, Mom would get around to looking at it. But we did edit the part about bothering Lorraine and all that, no reason to get grounded too.

So we sat and waited a little while, then we heard that sweet noise:

"LORRAINNE!" Mom screeched.

Life. Is. Good.

**A/N: Sorry about the shortness, I guess I have some writers block or something. But R&R!!**


	4. Clothes Shopping

**Disclaimer: Yup, you guessed it. I still don't own anyone from Cheaper by the Dozen...**

**A/N: I feel so horrible that I haven't updated in almost a month! It has been on my planner, believe me. But last week of school before break is total chaos, with last minute tests and we had two essay contests to enter. I also started a new story, and I wanted to add another chapter (which I did) so it could be a little on the same track. I hope to get chapter 5 in by January 2nd. I just really needed some free time, and a less crowded head to think of story ideas. With all those deadlines and facts to cram, you start going crazy. Oh yeah, for all of those who do read this story, try to review. I like knowing that people like the story. And thanks so much to the people who have been reviewing.**

**taynzpink: Always will :)**

**Insane and Logical: Thanks! I love writing about Sarah and Jake. But I sort of feel that it's easier to get into Jake's POV than Sarah's, and he's sort of the underdog in the movies, while some are always shown and talking.**

**Don't expect anything. Then you are never disappointed.: Yeah. That's pretty much why. I hope I didn't keep anyone waiting, I actually thought this was a short wait, not almost a month.**

**Chapter 4: Clothes Shopping**

**Jake:**

It's almost August, and in the Baker household, that means back-to-school-shopping. I know it sounds odd that we do this before the sales and a month before September, but I guess it's just easier that way. We go to about 12 million (hey, 12 is a great number) stores and shop all day. We all love it. I know this sounds odd, seeing as how Sarah and I would much rather go to skate park than to a mall, but this is the exception.

Nora stopped going after she finished college, she'd rather be working. What fun is that when you can spend Mom's money?

Charlie still comes, he's more of the family guy, it's a tradition he hates missing out on. And I guess he still comes for the fact that Mom still buys him clothes, regardless of the cost.

Mom loads every one of us into the car (that's right, no shifts, you have 11 kids at once to keep track of) and drives us to the mall. We walk in and go to this huge department store. This was a new mall, the old one got knocked down and some big building took its place.

"Kate? Kate Gilbreth?" We see this middle aged lady walk right up to Mom and hug her.

"Oh! Amber! Hi!" Mom looked pretty glad to see her.

"Um, is this someone we should know?" Charlie asked, staring like we were.

"Yes, kids, this is Amber. We have been friends since Pre-K, but somehow we lost touch after college..sorry about that. I've been moving quite a lot." Mom smiled at us.

"That's alright. So who are all of these kids? Some of your's and their friends?" We all started laughing.

"Guys, cut it. No, Amber, these are all of my kids. There are 11 of them, but one is too old for shopping with me, and is staying at work." We really tried not to laugh at Amber's look, but she seemed okay about us.

"Wow, that's a lot." Mom and Amber laughed. "So introduce me, Katie!"

"Alright then. Nora, my oldest, is 23, but isn't here. This is Charlie; he's 18 and just got out of high school." Charlie stepped up and shook hands. "And this is my little fashion girl, Lorraine, she's 16 now." Lorraine smiled and waved. It's not everyday that she gets complimented about being a fashion perfectionist. "This...is Henry; he's 14 and plays the clarinet." Henry nodded. "And these two...are my precious walking accidents waiting to happen, Sarah and Jake. They just turned 12 a little while ago." We smirked at the introduction, but quickly smiled and used our good hands to shake hands with Amber.

"Wow, what happened to your arms?" Amber smiled at the identical casts.

"We, kind of tried to...er...skate down the stairs, and it sort of, you know, backfired." I said sweetly. Amber laughed and nodded.

"Okay, this Mark, he's 10, soon to be 11. He's quite the animal lover." Mark nodded too. "These are my twin girls, Jessica and Kim. They are 9 and very book smart."

Jessica and Kim stepped up and smiled, "Pleasure, Miss Amber."

"Now this...is Mike. My little walking candy factory. He is 7, and loves to just carry candy around." Mom hugged him and he smiled. "These two are my 5 year old identical twins, Nigel and Kyle." They smiled and waved marker colored hands.

"Wow, they're all so sweet." Amber grinned. She's actually one of the few people who aren't snobby here and don't think we're animals.

"These two," Mom put one hand on each of our heads, "remind me of you. Very sporty, as you see." We looked up and smiled more. "So, what about you Am? Any kids? Married?"

"Nope, 'fraid not. Still flyin' solo. I like it that way." Amber said sweetly.

"You're...our hero..." Sarah and I sighed at the same time. We never obsessed over dating; we could care less if we ever went on a date.

"Glad to hear it!" Amber smiled. "Join me! I was planning to just walk around."

"Really? Normally people can't wait to get away from these kids." Mom said. We didn't know whether to take it as a compliment, or an insult.

"Never! You know how I have always wanted siblings." Mom nodded.

"Go and look around, and come back to me with what you find." We nodded, and Sarah and I ran to the sport jerseys.

"Sarah Elizabeth and Jacob Elliot! Where do you think you're going?" Mom asked, she wasn't yelling, but she didn't sound pleased.

"Uh...to the...sport jerseys..." Sarah said slowly, not sure if that was the answer that she should give.

"No. Please, Sarah, go with your sisters and shop with them. And Jake, go with your brothers. These are for school, not for home. You can have two jerseys for home and that's it." We groaned.

"You know what, Katie? You go help the rest of the lot, and I'll help these two. I'm beginning to enjoy them." We grinned. "Don't worry, I'll make sure they look good."

"Alright, Amb. Seeing as how you're the expert on this." Mom shrugged and walked off to find Nigel and Kyle throwing socks at each other. She left us with Amber.

"Okay," she led us to the girl section; we would go to the guys later. "I used to be a tomboy, just like you Sarah, and I still am." Sarah nodded and waited for her to continue. "But after NEVER, I mean never, being able to wear anything close to guy's clothes, I learned to pick out clothes from the girly section, without having to look like one of those freaky lookin' dolls." We started laughing. "But knowing your mom, you're going to have to get at least one really girly thing." I sort of laughed at the thought of my twin in pink. Amber walked around to one certain section and held out two shirts to almost look like something from the guys' section. "What about these?" Sarah nodded and they threw more clothes into each other's arms, and then it was time for me to shop.

"Okay, Jake. Knowing you, I don't think you'd want to wear anything that looks like church clothes." I shook my head and she nodded. "Right." She led us to an almost hidden corner. "These shirts are almost casual, but almost dressy." I loved them. So I nodded and then she threw more almost identical clothes at me.

We had to run to Mom to get her approval. She happened to nod too. "You did well. I'm very proud. Thanks Amber." Amber smiled and took us with Mom's credit card to the cashier.

"Hey, Amber? How did you know about all of these tomboy clothes?" Sarah had to look up, Amber was pretty tall.

"Well, I design them. I design them for the tomboys, and the guys who put up a fight when they are forced to dress up a little." She grinned at me.

"You're are our hero, no questions..." I sighed.

"Good. I haven't been anyone's hero before."

So, Mom actually took Amber back to her house after all our shopping was done, and then invited her to come spend a day at our house. We are so not pranking her.

**A/N: Hoped everyone liked it, I'm not sure where the idea came from...R&R!**


	5. No Supervision

**Disclaimer: (gasp) Don't anything from CBTD**

**A/N: Yay! Yet another chapter up. Sadly, it's back to school tomorrow (eek). SO I hope to get another chapter of this story, and my other two next week. **

**taynzpink: Thanks! I'm really trying to get in a new chapter every week**

**lambtastic: Yay. Merry late Christmas, and late Happy New Year!**

**Chapter 5: No Supervision**

**Jake:**

Amber is now one of our constant visitors (well, our only one, actually). She took Mom and Dad out for something all day, and Nora is at work. Charlie...well, who knows.

So, we did what any normal family of twelve would do. Go crazy.

But poor Sarah and me, we can't! We have our casts on for another day...one day! So now, we're hiding in our room. With the door locked.

You can just hear everything. There is a hockey game going on outside and our door is the home team's goal. I'm so proud of that fact, but very angry that we weren't out there playing. It's not a very good team either. Jessica and Kim against Nigel and Kyle. It's fun to listen to, though.

Henry was next door to us, painting his clarinet. He says it's washable...but that's not what the bottle says.

Now Mark was outside, we really don't want to know what he's doing. As for the others, we can't find them. Their loss.

"Oh, for the love of Mike!" I cried.

"Why, what's wrong?" Sarah turned to me.

I shook my head, "No! I really mean Mike. Look," I pointed at the window where Mike is swinging back and forth, back and forth.

"Sarah! Jake! Isn't this awesome! Wanna try? You don't need ANY hands!" He's laughing like a little crazy person.

"Man, get down from there. You're going to hurt yourself one of these days," Sarah snapped at Mike. Even though the kids with casts on from roller-skating down the stairs shouldn't be talking, we are right.

"Errrrr..fiiiine," Mike growled. We opened the window and watched him slowly fall. He doesn't like using the house to put his feet against to push off. It's more fun to freefall in his world.

So we sort of waited out the hockey by wandering the internet for two hours. Then we heard the sweet voice (not) of Lorraine.

"HEY PEOPLE! LUNCH IS READY!" She yelled. By now, all of us were upstairs, and came stampeding down.

We took out seats and stared at our lunch.

"Okay! We have: Lollipops, old Halloween candy, Twizzlers, leftover macaroni and cheese, and toast," Lorraine grinned.

"Uh, toast? That doesn't really go in the junk food category," Kim stated.

Lorraine smirked, "Well, it's all I know how to cook at the moment! So dig in!" We were all a little afraid of her now, and we did start eating.

So, after our lovely "home cooked" meal, we all had a nasty sugar high.

And how do you deal with this, you ask? GO OUTSIDE! And, we aren't supposed to. But the sugar is really starting to take over, so I could care less.

Sarah and I are jumping on the trampoline, Mike was back on the roof, Nigel and Kyle were smacking each other with foam baseball bats, and everyone else is in the pool.

"Should we go in there?" I asked. It looks so cool and refreshing, it's really warm out.

Sarah shook her head, "No! When Mom and Dad come home, we can get out the back of the net. So for once, everyone is in trouble, but not us!"

I grinned, "I love you, my evil plotting twin!" So I hugged her.

"Er, okay, enough family time..." we pulled away from the hug.

At around 5:00...or 2:00 in Nigel and Kyle's world, Mom and Dad pulled up. Sarah and I saw them coming up the street, and we were already in our room. By the time everyone else gets yelled at, we'll be all cleaned up. So, we both put out heads under the showerhead and got it wet, and Sarah put her hair in a towel. Now it looks like we both took showers, so no one could see the sweat that we had in our hair from jumping so much.

"Where are Sarah and Jake?!" We heard Dad say. So then footsteps came closer, and closer, and closer, until Mom and Dad opened the door to find us leaning against out beds, talking.

"Hey! What did you guys do today?" Mom asked sweetly.

"Well, we watched a little TV, ate lunch, and each took showers!" I said with a grin.

Dad nodded. "Good for you! So now everyone except you two...and Mike, becuase we can't find him yet...are grounded."

So, they left us. We sighed in relief but almost jumped when there was a knock at the window.

"Hey! Guys! Can you let me in? I sort of got stuck..." Mike sighed. We pulled him in and unhooked him.

"Get under the bed!" Sarah whispered to him.

Mike stared. "Why?!"

"Just do it!" Sarah pushed him under. I fully understood.

"Uh, Mom? Dad? We found Mike! We were playing Hide and Seek before lunch, and I guess we forgot to find him. So he's with us! We're getting the dust off him," I called to them. We weren't really lying. We did play with him early, and did forget him. He just came out during lunch.

"Okay guys! Make sure all the dust is off him, and he gets into clean clothes," Mom yelled back. We were going to have to anyway. He is covered in grass stains and the chalk that you put on your hands.

Yet another plan perfectly executed by Sarah and Jake.

**A/N: R&R! Chapter 6 will come up soon! Wow, wonder how that happens...**


	6. Fights

**Disclaimer: Yeah, pretty self explanatory. I don't own anything but the story...**

**A/N: I actually have today and tomorrow like a free combination day. To study, that is. So this is my break, here's to two midterms left!**

**taynzpink: I will, it bothers me when I keep putting it to the side. So at least this is later for a reason, not just becuase I procrastinate.**

**Insane and Logical: Thanks! I needed some evil plan of some sort...**

**Chapter 6: Fights**

**Jake:**

Mornings. In a house of fourteen, it's hectic. Even when school is out. We get up a little later, but still have a time to be up, dressed, and at the breakfast table.

Sarah and I are normally the first ones up; it's a habit I guess. But it's also to get the bathroom before anyone. We get up at least 45 minutes earlier. But we're walking towards the bathroom, half asleep, when we notice that someone is in there.

"Lorraine..." we growled.

I started banging on the door while Sarah yelled. "Hey! Princess! Do you mind?! Other people have to get ready!"

"You snooze, you lose. And I have to get this beautiful on weekends in case we go out somewhere," Lorraine squeaked. We rolled our eyes.

I shook my head. "I don't care! I have to go to the bathroom!"

"Well, hold it or use Mom and Dad's bathroom."

"We tried. They're in there! And it's our turn, it's on the chart," Sarah crossed her arms. So, I looked across to the bathroom chart. The weekend one. "It states: 'As long as Sarah and Jake are up and in the bathroom by 9:15, they are entitled to use it until 9:40.'" Sure enough, it was 9:16 already, we were early.

"I don't care!" the voice behind the door yelled.

So we waited, and waited, and waited. And she stayed there until 10:30. There was a line behind us.

"This is so wrong!" Jessica yelled.

Mike's eyes shifted from side to side.

"What is going through your head?" I asked with a glare.

"Well, let's just say this. Lorraine likes to do her hair with the door shut for privacy. Without a door, she can't do anything," Mike laughed evilly.

Sarah nodded, and so did I. "It's perfect," Sarah grinned. "Mike, get what you need. Um, Henry, stepstools. Kim, Jessica, Nigel, and Kyle, pillows. Mark, lookout." Everyone nodded and got up to do the jobs.

I stared, "So what do we do?"

"Wait. Wait for everyone to come back."

So, 15 minutes later, everyone did come back. Mike handed Sarah a screwdriver, and then gave one to me. Mike worked on the last hinge, Sarah worked on the middle, and I worked on top.

"Got it!" I whispered and got down with my hand against the door, then let go. We made a run for it.

A few seconds later, we heard a very faint crash (thanks to all the pillows, it landed even softer than we considered. Minutes after, a blow dryer and loud music shut off, and then we heard a high pitched scream.

"Mooooooooom!" Lorraine yelled. We heard her 'story' from the living room downstairs. Then, Dad came to us.

"Which one of you...unhooked the door from its hinges?" He stared. "Ok, if you turn yourselves in now, you won't get in trouble. So. Who did this?"

We all raised our hands (except for Charlie and Nora, who were working).

"Alright. Who were the masterminds?"

All hands dropped, except for Mike's.

"Interesting. Only one this time. Who unlatched the door?"

Mike, Sarah, and I raised our hands.

"Hm. Team work. Who participated?"

Everyone raised their hands again.

"Can someone explain to me why you did this? And by someone, I do mean one." He scanned for someone to talk. "Jacob, my boy, explain what got into your heads."

I sighed, "Well it all started when Lorraine took up our shower time, and then Henry's, then Kim and Jessica's, then Mark's, then Mike's, then Nigel and Kyle's. So, we decided to get her out..."

"Wait. She took up everyone's time?" Everyone nodded. "Alright. I'm letting you off this time. But if you make a habit out of unhooking doors, then you'll be in trouble." Everyone nodded once again.

"And, after you put the door back on the hinges, you will take turns to get ready for lunch."

Dang. A plan well though out. But apparently not enough.

We missed breakfast!

**A/N: R&R everyone!**


	7. Cooking

**Disclaimer: CBTD is owned by one of those big huge million dollar sort of places and not me**

**A/N: I am **so** sorry that I haven't updated in like, four months. Right after midterms, our English teacher gave us a six week research paper (which took up just about ALL of my free time...) and then gave us a hard unit to work on, followed into poetry. I better be getting a good grade for that class. So, after that our teachers just sort of realized that it was 3 weeks before finals and 4 weeks until we graduated, so they crammed in around 2 tests a day. Then, we had finals two weeks ago and I did well considering all the time I spent studying. I also did quite a number of babysitting jobs. So, that's why. I wasn't too lazy or anything, it's just that my teachers get a little homework/test crazy at the end of the year. I also got really sick around a week or two after my last update and I was only allowed to get on for an hour each day. So now its summer and I will update lots lots more.**

**LIVExLAUGHxLOVExPINK: Thanks. I was deep in thought when I wrote that chapter. (By the way, I love pink too. It's like, everything I own)**

**Insane and Logical: Thanks too. Sorry about the longness.**

**taynzpink: I know you've PMed me so many times, and I told you why :). So I hope you like this chapter.**

**Polkadot-Sunstar: Triple thanks. I love writing this. It lets me stay in that sort of immature state of mind, rather than the mature one. **

**Dreamgurl868: Thanks doubles. I hope you like this chapter too.**

**Chapter 7: Cooking**

**Jake:**

"Hey world that enjoys watching us!" Sarah smiled into the camera (Mom always tells us to smile; it keeps her fan rating up or something like that).

We paused. What else to say?

"...We were wondering why you guys come to our site so much. Lorraine gets mad. She keeps changing her makeup to please the fans. We're not creeped or anything, we're flattered, actually..." I said...wandering off to look out the window. "Sarah, Mike wants to be let in," I said, nodding to the shaggy-haired little boy twirling in front of our window. I say this now like it's nothing. We scrambled up to the window and let him in. Mike shook the chalk off of himself and ran out of the room.

Sarah sighed, "Sorry about that. But anyways --"

"Sarah! Jake! Come down here!" Mom yelled from the bottom of the stairs. We shut the camera off and flashed each other a look of panic. What did we do now?

Apparently, it was something the whole family did. (Excluding Nora)

"None of you are in trouble. Except Lorraine," Mom said. Haha.

"What did I do?!" Lorraine squeaked. She needs a new voice.

Mom glared, "Well, we can start off with the little candy lunch you gave your younger siblings a few days ago. That was NOT proper, young lady. And you call yourself ready to graduate next year. You can't cook a thing!"

"...I can cook something! I cook cereal...and toast," Lorraine stated with pride. Does she expect an award or something? I mean, really.

"Those don't count," Mom shook her head, "Even Nigel and Kyle can make those. With supervision, of course." Nigel and Kyle laughed and clapped. Not much else you can do when everyone around you is in hysterics. "So," Mom continued, "Since none of you can cook, I'm giving you cooking lessons." She put an apron over her head. "Put on your aprons, welcome to Baker Home Ec 101." We put ours on, startled. Then we were instructed to sit at the table.

"Okay, guys, we're going to cook a full course dinner..." Mom said. Nigel and Kyle raised their hands. "Kyle," she called on them. They say the same thing anyways.

"We haven't had lunch yet," Kyle said sweetly.

"Well, you two can make lunch while the others make dinner. I'll pick something you know already. PB&J. Get moving you two." Kyle and Nigel did High Fives and ran into the kitchen and got working. Mom had it planned; it was set up for them.

"Now, I'm putting three on appetizers, three on dessert, and the rest on the actual dinner." We all looked around at each other, wondering who was getting what.

"Jessica, Mark, and Kim - appetizers." They nodded and got up. "Ummm...Sarah, Jake, and Mike - dessert."

"YES!" Sarah, Mike, and I slapped hands and went into the kitchen.

Mom stared and the 3 older kids that were left, "Henry, Lorraine, and Charlie, dinner, please." They came in shortly after.

Sarah, Mike and I were set up around a few dessert cookbooks, while others were looking at what they were assigned to. We were eating our lunch, and Nigel and Kyle were sent upstairs to play becuase Mom didn't want them touching anything hot, sharp, or dangerous.

"Um, Mom," I raised my hand. She came over. "All of these dessert things look either too hard or tastes disgusting. I mean really, who makes a layered raspberry and peanut butter ice cream and calls it PB&J ice cream. Why would someone make a peanut butter ice cream?!"

"Not to mention...raspberries taste icky with peanut butter," Mike stated. We stared. "What? It's not like I tried it. Well, okay, maybe I did."

Mom sighed, "I'll think of something for you guys. Meanwhile, I need to get the older ones (who are anyone above Sarah and me) started with dinner, and Jess, Kim, and Mark with those appetizers." She walked off.

Well, it turns out that our so-called elegant dinner has turned into an indoor barbeque. Jessica, Kim, and Mark are making pigs in a blanket, Charlie is making a steak, Henry is making hamburgers, and Lorraine is attempting making French fries.

We're still waiting. So here we are sitting, while everyone else is working. But at least we have these funny cookbooks to laugh at.

"Okay you three! I got what you need to make dessert," Mom said, handing us a large...well, I don't know what it is,...with a crank on it. Mike tried putting his head inside it.

"What _is _this?" Sarah said, inspecting the outside.

"It's an ice cream maker. I figured you guys could make some," she handed us the instructions.

After awhile, we got everything in and started using the crank. We turned it for about 15 minutes and tasted it.

"Ew!" Sarah and I screeched.

"Mike, put more sugar in it," he poured in a lot, but it tasted much better.

"Hey, mom?" Sarah asked.

Mom came walking in, "Yes?"

"How old is this?"

"It was your great grandmother's."

Our mouths dropped. She smiled and walked out.

An hour or so later, we stopped turning the crank and put it in the freezer, waiting for dinner. Then we cleaned up and got ready for dinner.

We sat in the living room eating the appetizers and watched TV until we were called in for dinner.

The dinner was pretty good, except the French fries turned into potato chips, which weren't good. But, Lorraine made them, so it's understandable.

Now it was our turn and Mom put out 14 bowls and served us the ice cream we made.

Dad took the first spoonful and put it in his mouth, "It's really sweet."

Sarah and I tasted it, "It wasn't that sweet when we put it in the freezer." We looked over to Mike.

"I just wanted it to taste like Coldstone..." he said sheepishly.

Our parents didn't like it, but all the kids did. We ate on and you know what that means..

SUGAR HIGH! Man I love those...

**A/N: Hope everyone likes this! Please Please R&R. I'm going to go get some ice cream from the fridge...bye!**


	8. Switcheroo

**Disclaimer: I don't own CBTD**

**A/N: Hey, all. I hope I didn't keep anyone waiting long. My math homework is piling up like crazy.**

**LIVExLAUGHxLOVExPINK: Same. My mom said that she could take away anything that has sugar in it and I'd still be on an energy high.**

**Dreamgurl868: I know right. It's been a really long time since I made ice cream by scratch. I do remember it was annoying and really long. And I was mad becuase the chapter got me thinking about Coldstone and that we don't have one here.**

**taynzpink: Always will.**

**Chapter 8: Switcheroo**

**Jake:**

Good morning everyone. I hope you slept well, because I sure didn't.

Just like our normal tradition, every Baker kid (minus Nora, Charlie, Nigel, and Kyle this year) goes downstairs after Mom and Dad are fast asleep. It only happens twice a year, the day before summer vacation starts and the day before school starts. We goof until we can sleep. Sarah and I made ice cream and we let Mike put sugar in.

Needless to say, we had nasty sugar highs and we didn't get to bed until 3 am. That's pretty awesome unless you have to get up at 5:30.

"Come on kids, wake up. You all look like you only got 2 hours of sleep," Mom said as she handed everyone their breakfast. That'd be a funny line, if it weren't true.

We ate our breakfast slowly and headed out the door like snails.

"Bye, guys," Charlie said as he finished walking Sarah and me to school. We're the only Bakers in junior high right now. Mark will get into 6th grade next year. We're in 7th right now.

"Bye, Charlie!" we called back and ran upstairs. One of the reasons I love this school is that we never have to change our lockers. One thing I don't love is that the lockers are in this one big room, very inconvenient if most of you classes are in the other side of the school.

Sarah and I managed to make it to lunch carrying 4 classes worth of books around. The last 4 classes are close to the locker room. Hey, that's kind of funny, locker room. Hehe.

Sarah had lacrosse practice after school, so I normally wait in the bleachers until her team is done. Sad for me, basketball and soccer don't start yet.

"Jake! Jake! JAKE!" Sarah said as she ran down the rows of lockers. She grabbed me at mine (which is right next to hers). "There you are!" she exclaimed.

I stared, "Well, where else would I be? And what's so important that you have to yell and smack my head against the locker door?"

"Well, hehe, I kind of got detention. Funny story, right?" Sarah gives me a nervous smile.

"What?!" I exclaimed, "Dude, it's like the first day of school and you got in trouble, and by yourself too. That's low. What'd you do?"

"Well, it all started with a few teacher jokes, and my lacrosse stick almost breaking a window. Enough said. So, I need you to do something."

"And this favor better not mean me wearing a dress. Again." Yes, I had to once. She got detention once last year and I had to go to her home ec fashion show as her. Pink frills and I do not mix. At all. Oh, and by the way, Mom picked home ec for her. It's her only class without me.

"No! No! Not at all. You just have to wear my practice uniform."

I nodded, "Oh okay. Wait, what?!"

"I need you to be me at practice while me me goes to detention."

"Fine. Two questions. What will I do with MY clothes? And second, won't your coach notice that you were on today's detention list? I mean, you can't say that you snuck out in between becuase you'll get another detention, but you can't say that I helped becuase I'll get detention. I'm going for a record, Sarah. Don't call me goody two shoes or anything, but I don't want a detention."

She sighed, "They won't notice. You can put your clothes in my bag. Girls can't invade each other's privacy at practice. And I really need you to do this for me. Coach says I'll get kicked off the team if I don't come to this practice."

"Fine," I sighed back. She shoved her lacrosse bag and her stick in my hands. "You owe me!" I yelled as I walked down the hall to change.

I got into the uniform and hid my hair under her team cap. I walked out of the boys' bathroom (it was a wonder they didn't notice me walking out) and into the field.

"Sarah!" One of her friends, Vanessa...er, some sort of long name. And by the way, I know we're really identical, save for gender. But isn't it sad that I can pass for my sister?

"Hey, Vanessa," I said, making my voice a little higher. Oh yeah, my voice hasn't changed yet either. It's also sad when our grandmother calls the house and calls me Sarah and Sarah me.

"Oh! I want you to try my new lip gloss! It would be awesome to match." And Vanessa is trying to get Sarah to use lip gloss. "Come here, I'll put it on," she said, knowing Sarah would pull away (as would I). Yuck. Now I'm wearing makeup.

"Alright ladies! I noticed your running was a little poor the last few weeks before school ended. So, here's your new training method," Sarah's coach stepped aside to reveal a box. Right inside it happened to be...

High heels. You have to be kidding me. First the lip gloss (which I took off seconds after Vanessa put it on) and now this? Sarah _really_ owes me.

Her coach circled the box, "Heels will cause you to stand up straight and run with grace. Pick a pair, ladies." Obviously, she hasn't seen me run in heels. I haven't even seen me run in heels. I didn't plan on ever having to do so.

"Sarah! Sarah!" Vanessa called. It's really hard to answer to her name when I'm Jake. "I got matching pairs for us! Isn't that cool!" Oh, yes. Lovely, Vanessa. Thanks for making this day even brighter.

High heels aren't as hard to run in as I thought, but they sure are annoying. I mean, there are like 5,000 straps that hook around your foot and ankle and then these aren't my size so they're huge on me. I only fell 7 times so far. If I was on the basketball court, I would've never gotten up. Thank you, grass.

"Baker!" her coach called as we were packing up. Thank you! A name I can answer to!

"Um, yeah coach?" I said as I got up. The call made me fall. Hey, that rhymes! Oh yeah, 8 falls now.

She eyed me a little which made me nervous, "Good job out there, kiddo, you've changed. No longer are you the aggressive Sarah Baker who almost broke one of her teammates kneecaps, but a fair playing girl."

First of all, uh-oh. I forgot that Sarah sort of is a little bit...well, competitive. I mean, I am too, but not as hard as her. Our only difference is that I'm more polite and fair, and she's aggressive and shoves anything or anyone who is in her way of winning. Not a huge difference between us in my world.

Second, its not like I can hit a girl! That's like number 1 on the list of things a guy shouldn't do. Number two is not to go dressing up in girls' clothes, but I guess that rule went out the window at the fashion show. But mom taught me never to do that. I don't care if I'm supposed to be Sarah. If I do shove, hit, and flip over these girls, my luck will turn and Sarah and I will get caught. Not only would we get one detention for pulling a switch, I'd get another detention for hitting every girl playing against me. Unlike Sarah, I have never been suspended off my sports teams. She has over 7 times, only 3 for lacrosse.

"...Uh, thanks!" I said and ran off into the field again. Two seconds later, Sarah's coach blew the whistle for the end of practice.

"Sarah!" Vanessa called again; I let her catch up with me.

"Hi Vanessa..." I moaned. Talking to this girl is like talking to Barbie. Or, at least I think that's what its like. All she can ask people is about hair, makeup, and guys, all of which Sarah would rather avoid.

She grinned at me (painted on just like Barbie's I guess), "So, what are you doing? Not going to the girl's room to switch out of the uniform?"

"No, I have to go meet my brother," it felt weird saying that about me, but I guess it is true. We meet Charlie outside soon, "so I can't talk right now."

"Oh, well, okay, bye!" She turned to the other group of girls. I ran into the guys' bathroom and got out of the uniform. I forgot how much I love regular shoes. I love you, sneakers.

I came out of the bathroom just as Sarah came to meet me.

"So, how was practice?"

"You owe me. Big time. I'm not even kidding about how much you owe me," I said.

**A/N: R&R all the people who read this!**


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